Forgive me in advance for what is about to be a very scattered post. I was lying in bed only moments ago, reading Irresistable Revolution by Shane Claiborn and had to log some of my thoughts.
For the first time in my life I want to live in a way that draws attention. Not for being better at something, or for succeeding in something that is ultimately meaningless, but for standing out against the normal patterns of humanity.
I want to reach out to others in need and help them as best I can. I want to give up my excess so that others can simply have enough. I want to give it all away. Will I? Can I? That I do not know. What’s important is that for the first time, possibly ever, I am truly desiring it.
This last week God has shown me great things. Never before have I known how he would use me, or why he was calling me. All along I’ve known that he was calling me to do something different; calling me to do something greater. It wasn’t until I visited Josh at Watermelon Ministries that I got a glimpse of just how great my service can be. For me, it isn’t enough to simply focus some of my time on ministry. God hasn’t called me to “help others when I can”, God has called me (all of us, even) to serve others always.
For the last two years I have been praying for God to use me in some way, to guide my steps and show me where to go. Really, what I had been asking for is “God, help me find an excuse to keep doing commercial work so that I won’t have to experience poverty for myself.” It is time I stop playing things safe â€” I am ready to live recklessly for Christ.
On the surface this means that I will be working for His House and sharing my talents to bless as many other ministries as I can. Underneath this means that I will be pruning back the areas in my life that I have not yet turned over to Christ.
After this month I will no longer be taking on commercial design projects. God has called me to separate myself from the ways of the world, and I wish to honor that call. There is more to this life than money, and I hope to experience that. I no longer wish to live as myself; I have died to that way of life. I have found new life. Christ lives within me.
Please pray for me as I begin a new walk with Christ. Pray that I could continue to persue a life of financial instibility and would rejoice in it.
Thank you for taking the time out of living your life to learn a little bit about mine. May God bless you!